


Inner Demons

by paradox_steel



Category: Homestuck
Genre: All of the Striders/Lalondes are demons yay, Demons, F/F, F/M, Hallucinations, John is a paranoiac, Later chapters may contain smut, M/M, Other Additional Tags to Be Added, Paranoia, Paranormal Beings, Sleep Deprivation, Supernatural Abilities, i hope this isn't cringey, i wrote this at 3 a.m, this is my first fanfic please spare me
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2016-05-01
Updated: 2016-06-05
Packaged: 2018-06-05 15:40:45
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence, Underage
Chapters: 3
Words: 2,432
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/6711070
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/paradox_steel/pseuds/paradox_steel
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Plagued by nightmares, John Egbert must overcome ghastly visions of a horrid being who seems to torment him to no end. The nightmares seem to never end, until he meets Dave Strider. All seems to be going well for the two until he realizes something isn't quite right about Dave.. or the majority of his friends.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

John Egbert arose from his sleep in a cold panicked sweat for the third time this week. He was unsure why he had for some reason fell victim to recurring nightmares that all had one similar characteristic. The same disturbing characteristic that he could remember vividly. Glowing, ominous red eyes staring threatiningly and hungrily at him, as if they were the eyes of a large predator preparing to strike at him and devour him whole. He shuddered at the thought of the nightmares, and reached for his glasses as he silently decided that he would not be getting any more sleep tonight. Hell, he wouldn't be getting any more sleep until he could finally forget the nightmares, or until they stopped. He knew that he would need closure. He couldn't sit there and allow himself to deteriorate from the severe lack of sleep. He periodically removed his glasses to rub his eyes tiredly as tears pricked at his blue orbs which had been growing dull with exhaustion lately. No matter who he told, he couldn't be taken seriously. He told everyone he could- his cousins Jade and Jake, his half-sister Jane, his beloved father, and even his ex-boyfriend, Karkat. They all brushed it off, and told him that he was overthinking everything and simply being delusional.  
While his father had indeed noticed the sudden change in his son's behavior and tried to help as much as he could, his attempts to comfort his son failed. He'd already taken John to see at least five therapists in the past two weeks, and all of them failed to give John the help he needed. On the nights that he tried to follow his therapist's suggestions to make the nightmares go away, the moment he fell into a deep slumber, he was welcomed by particularly horrid and gory nightmares. He sighed, and checked the time on his phone- 5:09 a.m. He'd have to start getting ready for school in about two hours, anyway. He pulled on a hoodie, and finally decided to go confide in Jane, despite his previous attempts to do so failing, as she just.. didn't understand the trouble they caused her brother- physically and mentally. He'd been exhausted and grown paranoid. He was surprised that he hadn't developed insomnia yet. He limped out of bed, and placed his hand on the doorknob. The moment he did, he got an extremely bad feeling in his gut, as if something were waiting for him on the other side of the door. He backed away from the door, feeling for his phone and using the light to find the remote to turn on his television. He was a bit naive, but wasn't that naive. He wouldn't be completely helpless if something were waiting for him on the other side of that door. After turning on the television, he had a sufficient amount of light in the room to illuminate a bit of the corridor, but that was a mere assumption. If there was anyone in front of his door waiting for him, at least he'd get a mediocre view of their face. He twisted the doorknob, his hand shaking anxiously. He flung open the door, and was greeted by a tall, most likely masculine figure with eyes that resembled the creature's eyes from his nightmares. They stared ominously at him, not even blinking. John froze in terror for a split second before screaming and throwing a weak punch at the figure, which was seemingly unfazed. He could hear his father's alarmed call of "John?", and his father shuffling about in his room, presumably hurrying to the door. The figure sprinted down the corridor, stopping just a bit before the large window at the end of the hallway.  
Barely visible in the early morning light, the figure turned back to John, hissed, and began to dissipate into a black, dust-like substance and finally fading away into the darkness. The eerie glow of its eyes remained for a split second before dissipating as well. John's father burst out of his room, looking frantically down the corridor and visibly distraught before laying his eyes upon his son.  
"John," His father started, trying to mask the fear in his voice with courage. John however, stood motionless in the hallway, stunned and dumbfounded. He tried to form words, though his voice caught in his throat, causing only incoherent syllables to emerge from his mouth. He was frozen to the spot, and didn't respond to his father's questions- as expected, the typical "Are you okay?" and "What happened?"  
John finally managed to murmur, "..Nightmare.." before walking towards Jane's room as he originally intended. Jane looked just as distressed as their father, and had emerged from her room once she heard the commotion- the footsteps, their father's panicked voice, her brother's incoherent murmuring. John slowly pushed past Jane before entering her room and sitting on her bed, curling up into a ball and biting his lower lip until it bled. He was extremely paranoid now, and for the first time in his life, couldn't wait until he had to go to school. He wanted to be anywhere but in that godforsaken room, or house.  
However, he couldn't ignore the ominous feeling in stirring up within him. The feeling that told him that this was only the beginning. The feeling that told him that there was so much more to come.


	2. Chapter 2

After the morning's events, John was understandably shaken up, just as any person would be. He tried his best to allow Jane and his father to comfort him, but he couldn't simply be calmed down. He was scared. He was already afraid to sleep at night for fear of seeing the being, but to have that ghastly figure bleed into reality? That was extremely unsettling, and he just wanted answers. He wanted to know what he's done to have this horrid being torment him in his dreams and in reality. He felt vulnerable. He knew that by not doing anything about this, or trying to get away, he was allowing himself to be more susceptible to being harmed by the things that he wasn't aware of, and frankly, didn't want to be aware of.  
Dragging a shaky hand through his jet-black hair, he took a shuddering breath and adjusted his glasses, beginning to exit Jane's room. Before he could do so, his father's gentle voice interrupted his thoughts.  
"John," his father began softly, hoping not to frighten or provoke his already scared son. John simply turned around in response and looked at his father, and he could see the pain in his father's eyes, clearly caused by having to see his son in such a fragile state of body and mind. Dark circles were beginning to form under his eyes from the lack of sleep, and he'd tremble randomly, obviously weakened. His usually sparkling ocean-blue eyes had grown dull. John's father took a deep breath and began to speak once more.  
"If you want, you don't have to go to school toda-"  
"No, I'm fine." John interrupted. He couldn't stand to be here any longer. He had to get out. There was a slim chance that his friends could manage to calm him down, though that was quite unlikely, given the present circumstances.  
John's father simply nodded as he watched his son exit the room, before turning to Jane and seeing the hurt on her face as well. Jane was silent for a minute, staring at her father, then to the ground before stating,  
"...He needs help."  
That statement broke her father's heart, and she could see it on his face. He was suppressing a bit of tears, though he didn't want Jane to see. He tried to blink them away, though one slid down his cheek in the process. He hurried out of the room before nodding and telling Jane to get ready for school, then entering his room to be alone, presumably until he could control his emotions.  
Unbeknownst to the two, John heard all of this. His father and sister's distress only made him feel guilty. Why must his problems be the cause of their unhappiness? It wasn't fair. They did nothing wrong, and yet they were suffering along with him. John took a deep breath before entering his room to resume getting ready for school. The current stress he was under would only worsen his current condition- if that were even possible.  
After brushing his teeth, he threw on a simply pair of dark jeans, a light blue shirt, and a dark blue hoodie. He quickly put on a pair of Converse, grabbed his backpack, and exited his home.  
The early morning light he'd previously seen had transformed, leaving a light blue sky painted with clouds and a crisp breeze in it's wake. It was May, and it was beautiful outside. He would've taken his time getting to school and admired the scene, if he didn't have the constant paranoia that something would try to attack him if he weren't careful enough.  
Looking around, he saw children happily skipping to school in groups with their friends, and teenagers who were presumably their older siblings following them, barely paying any attention to them as they talked with their friends casually.  
John's eyes watered, and he tried his best to blink the tears away. He wanted that. He wanted back his sense of naivety and sense of security. He hated being overwhelmed by paranoia and anxiety. He hated the feeling of vulnerability.  
He sighed as a tear fell down his face. He looked down as to not bring attention to himself, and he wiped it away, hoping that no one would notice that a 16 year-old boy who looked like an empty shell of a human was walking alone by himself, and crying. He held his head down, but after feeling sleep beginning to creep upon him, he quickly raised his head and looked around. Everything seemed normal except for one thing.  
The dark figure was back.  
It stared at him hungrily once more, and John stopped dead in his tracks and stared back, eyes beginning to widen in alarm. Fear paralyzed him, and he knew his fight-or-flight response would eventually work, but now? He couldn't even speak. He tried to force a scream, yet all that came out was a quiet whimper. He remained frozen like this for several seconds before he finally blinked, and once he did, the figure was gone.  
John shook his head and nope'd the fuck out. He began to sprint to school, praying that it was a mere hallucination. He only felt somewhat safe once he was in school, despite the familiar sounds of everyone shuffling about and talking throughout the halls only seemed to disorient him more.  
When he finally fought his way through the halls and made it to his locker, he was relieved to see Jade standing there with a cup of coffee in her hand, looking around and seemingly waiting for him. Once she saw him, she smiled and moved so he could access his locker.  
"John," She greeted him happily, taking a sip of her coffee and adjusting her glasses. Her emerald eyes shined brightly, contrasting John's dark blue, almost lifeless eyes. No joy seemed to appear in them any more, and they looked somewhat glassy.  
Despite this, John tried to force his most genuine, yet fake smile. "Hi Jade." He murmured, exhaustion clear in his voice. Once Jade heard this, her face fell almost immediately, and John's stomach dropped.  
"John.. are you okay?" Jade asked, now concerned.  
"Hm? Me? I'm, uh, I'm fine, Jade. Thanks for asking though." John said, trying to maintain his chipper demeanor, yet to no avail. Jade saw right through this and responded with a gentle, yet serious tone in her voice.  
"You didn't get enough sleep last night, did you?"  
John's smile fell and the exhaustion became evident on his face. He looked down, almost seemingly ashamed of himself at making his cousin so concerned for his well-being for something that most people would excuse as petty or childish.  
John said quietly once more, "I'm fine, Jade." as he closed his locker and finally turned to face her.  
"No you're not. John.. look.. these nightmares you're having.. they really are serious, aren't they..?"  
Jade looked hurt and concerned for him. John couldn't help but look away and sigh in relief and annoyance.  
He was relieved that she was finally beginning to understand just how serious his current condition was getting, though he was also annoyed because of how long it took her to understand.  
"I guess so." John muttered as the bell finally rang for class. He was relieved once more that he could excuse himself from this extremely tense situation- he was beginning to grow uncomfortable and overwhelmed. As he began to walk away and head to his first class, Biology, Jade grabbed him by the arm, making him jump and turn around, fear evident on his face.  
"John.. I'll talk to you later. But please.. take care of yourself, okay?" Jade said, looking even more concerned now that they had to depart form each other. John nodded and said quietly, "I will. Thanks, Jade." Before walking to class and trying to calm himself down.  
As he entered the class, he sat at his desk, noticing a tall blonde male standing in front of the room talking to the teacher. He wore a dark pair of sunglasses, a red hoodie, and black jeans and looked overly casual. He observed the male for a while before distracting himself by daydreaming. After about five minutes, he heard the teacher greeting the class, though he didn't pay any attention. This was the closest thing to sleep he could get without fear of the being appearing. The teacher then went on to introduce a new student to the class, and only when she motioned to the male did John perk up and begin to pay attention.  
"Now," The teacher said, smiling.  
"Would you mind telling the class your name?"  
The male nodded and adjusted a pair of headphones that John hadn't initially noticed he was wearing.  
"Dave Strider."


	11. Author's Note

Hey guys, I'm so sorry I haven't updated recently. School is only getting more stressful by the day now that the school year's almost over, so I've been busy with that.  
BUT WAIT, THERE'S MORE!  
I'm finally getting out of that hellhole next week, so after that I will surely give you guys more updates! After all, you all deserve it for waiting so long..

~Paradox


End file.
